People call us saying things like “Dad was never one for church, he spent every weekend at the allotments. A stuffy funeral just isn’t him.”
That’s exactly why celebration of life services have taken off. Half of all UK funerals in 2024 were celebrations of life rather than traditional services [1]. People want something real. Something that actually fits the person who died.
We’re Welham Jones. Been helping families in Tunbridge Wells since 2015. These celebrations often mean more to families than traditional services.
Right, so what’s the difference?
Traditional funeral, everyone wears black, sits quietly, follows a set order of service. Usually religious. Often feels disconnected from who the person actually was.
Celebration of life, you focus on the person’s story. Their quirks. What they loved. What made people laugh about them.
You might have someone obsessed with trains, you could play train sounds as people arrive, or have family wear old railway memorabilia during eulogies. Sounds daft, but personal touches like this often mean everything to families.
Research backs this up too. 68% of over-50s prefer their funeral to be a celebration rather than traditional ceremony [2]. Makes sense when you think about it.
Our graveside services in Tunbridge Wells provide a heartfelt and intimate farewell.
Pretty much anywhere that feels right.
Kent & Sussex Crematorium is the obvious choice. Fits 90 people, plus 30 standing [3]. They give you 45 minutes, which is decent time. No rushing like some places.
Churches: if your family’s religious but wants something less formal. St Barnabas in Rusthall is good for this. King Charles the Martyr in town too. Depends on the vicar really.
Weird venues: we’ve helped with venues like the Assembly Hall Theatre (for someone who loved amateur dramatics), back gardens (for large families), even pub function rooms. Places like the Royal Oak in Hawkhurst have function spaces that work for less formal gatherings.
Families sometimes choose narrowboats on the Medway, especially if their loved one always wanted to live on water. Bit cramped, but can work for smaller groups.
Explore our simple and dignified direct cremation services in Tunbridge Wells.
Start with what made them them.
Music first. Forget hymns unless they actually liked hymns. You might play everything from Vera Lynn to AC/DC. Some families choose nothing but Elvis if their loved one was a big fan.
Photos everywhere. Not just the formal portraits either. Holiday snaps, work pictures, them being silly with grandkids. Real life stuff.
Get people talking. Formal eulogies are fine, but better when different people share short memories. Their old work colleague. Neighbour. Someone from the bowls club. Mix it up.
Plan a dignified traditional funeral service in Tunbridge Wells that honours your loved one.
After 25 years, you build relationships.
We work with the crematorium staff regularly, they know when families want something different and they’re helpful about it. Not jobsworths.
Local churches vary. Some vicars are brilliant at personal services. Others… less so. We know which ones get it.
Catering, there are local suppliers who do brilliant funeral teas. Nothing fancy, but proper homemade food. Makes a difference when sandwiches don’t taste like cardboard.
Musicians, we work with a pianist who can play most requests from memory. Also have contacts for bagpipers if that’s your preference.
The venue matters but the people matter more. You want suppliers who understand what you’re trying to do.
Same as any funeral for the basics.
You still need us to collect your person, do the paperwork, provide transport, staff on the day. That doesn’t change whether it’s traditional or celebration.
Where costs vary, venues, food, extras.
Crematorium service with sandwiches after? Might be £3,000 total including our fees.
Hotel venue with proper meal and live music? Could be £6,000 plus.
Home gathering with family providing food? Might save you £1,000.
Average send-off cost in 2024 was £2,861 [4]. Most families spend somewhere around this whether it’s traditional or celebration style.
We give you written costs upfront. No surprises later.
Same options as always.
73% choose cremation now [5]. After that:
Scattering (51% do this): could be anywhere meaningful. The allotments. Dunorlan Park. That bench overlooking the common where they fed ducks.
Keep at home (27%): mantelpiece, special place in garden, wherever feels right.
Bury (20%): cemetery plot, woodland burial, churchyard if there’s family connection.
People scatter ashes in all sorts of meaningful places. The allotments where someone spent weekends. Dunorlan Park where they walked dogs. That bench overlooking the common where they fed ducks. We’ve helped with scattering requests at places like football grounds, special gardens, or quiet spots around Tunbridge Wells Common.
Choose our environmentally responsible green funerals in Tunbridge Wells for a sustainable farewell.
Depends on your family really.
Traditional works when: Your person was religious. Family expects it. Provides structure when you’re all over the place with grief.
Celebration works when: Traditional feels wrong for who they were. You want something personal. Family’s not particularly religious.
Mix of both: We help with lots of these. Proper service at church or crematorium, then celebration somewhere else after. Gets the best of both approaches.
Families sometimes split on preferences. Traditional-minded relatives might want formal service, while others prefer celebration. Sometimes the solution is doing both, traditional service in morning, celebration in afternoon.
Don’t overthink it. What would they have wanted? Start there.
Learn how our funeral arrangements can be tailored to reflect your loved one’s wishes.
Hobby-themed: For train enthusiasts, amateur dramatics lovers, people who restored classic cars. You could transform a venue to reflect their passion.
Military: Proper formal but celebrating service rather than mourning. Last Post, flag presentation, stories about military days.
Charity fundraisers: Combine memorial with raising money for their cause. Cancer Research, local hospice, animal rescue. Feels productive while honouring them.
Delayed celebrations: Some families wait months. Process the grief first, then celebrate when they’re ready.
Garden parties: Surprisingly popular. Marquee in back garden, everyone brings something, like a wake that’s actually cheerful.
We listen before we suggest anything.
Over 10 years doing this locally. We know what works, what doesn’t, which suppliers deliver, which venues suit different families.
Available 24/7. Grief doesn’t keep office hours. Neither do we.
Handle all the practical stuff so you can focus on family. Legal paperwork, coordinating venues, managing timing on the day.
Most importantly, we get it. Some families want traditional, some want celebration, most want something in between. No judgment either way.
Look, funerals are hard whatever format you choose.
You’re dealing with losing someone important while making decisions about venues, costs, who speaks, what music. It’s overwhelming.
That’s where we help. Take the practical pressure off so you can do the important bit, saying goodbye properly.
Whether that’s traditional hymns in ancient church or Elvis tribute in community hall doesn’t matter. What matters is it feels right for your family.
Been doing this long enough to see what helps people heal. Sometimes it’s formal ceremony. Sometimes it’s sharing funny stories over cups of tea. Usually it’s bit of both.
Call us when you need help. Day or night. We’ll figure out what works for your family.
Our funeral director in Tunbridge Wells is here to provide compassionate guidance every step of the way.
[1] “Taking a Look at Funeral Trends & Costs,” Whiteballoon, https://www.whiteballoon.co.uk/taking-a-look-at-funeral-trends-costs/
[2] “The Last Hurrah: Seven in Ten Brits Like the Idea of a Funeral Being a Celebration of Life,” Mintel, https://www.mintel.com/press-centre/the-last-hurrah-seven-in-ten-brits-like-the-idea-of-a-funeral-being-a-celebration-of-life/
[3] “Kent and Sussex Cemetery and Crematorium,” Fenix Funeral, https://fenixfuneral.co.uk/locations/cemeteries/kent/tunbridge-wells/kent-and-sussex-cemetery-and-crematorium-tunbridge-wells-kent/
[4] “Taking a Look at Funeral Trends & Costs,” Whiteballoon, https://www.whiteballoon.co.uk/taking-a-look-at-funeral-trends-costs/
[5] “Taking a Look at Funeral Trends & Costs,” Whiteballoon, https://www.whiteballoon.co.uk/taking-a-look-at-funeral-trends-costs/
Absolutely. They’re flexible about music, readings, and personal touches. The chapel fits 90 people seated plus 30 standing. You get 45 minutes which is decent time for personal tributes.
Most local churches are open to it now. St Barnabas in Rusthall is particularly good for less formal services. King Charles the Martyr in town center too. Depends on the individual vicar really.
Course you can. We’ve helped with Assembly Hall Theatre, pub function rooms like the Royal Oak in Rusthall, family homes, even Dunorlan Park for outdoor gatherings. Wherever feels right for your family.
Common problem in Tunbridge Wells families. Sometimes we do both – formal service at crematorium, then celebration at different venue. Church service followed by gathering at home works well too.
Basic funeral director services are same either way. Difference is venue and extras. Crematorium service might be £3,000 total, hotel venue with meal could be £6,000. Home gathering saves money.
Popular choice. Families scatter at Dunorlan Park, High Weald countryside, allotments, family gardens. Need permission for some public spaces but we help sort that out.
Depends on the person. Some older relatives prefer traditional format, others love the personal approach. Often compromise works – bit of formal structure with personal elements added.
Address:
39 Crescent Rd
Royal Tunbridge Wells
TN1 2LZ
How to find us: Map
Phone: 01892 300330
Email: tunbridgewells@welhamjones.co.uk
Business Hours:
Monday to Friday: 9am to 5pm
Saturday and Sunday: appointment only
For community deaths outside those hours, we also provide a 24/7 response, 365 days of the year.
