Planning your own funeral allows you to outline your personal preferences, relieve your family of difficult decisions during emotional distress, and ensure your final send-off truly reflects your life. Taking time for funeral planning today gives you total clarity over your choices while helping your loved ones carry out your exact wishes across West Kent and South East London.
You can start planning your funeral at any point in adulthood by deciding on burial or cremation, ceremony style, music, readings, coffins, and flowers, and recording these in a letter of wishes or securing them with a pre-paid plan. Arranging your preferences through an independent, family-run funeral director like Welham Jones ensures your personal choices are documented, guaranteed, and protected against future cost increases.
You can start planning your funeral at any time in your adult life, and can take out a pre-paid funeral plan from age 18, though many will begin to think about planning during milestones such as updating their will in their 40s or at the beginning of retirement.
Thinking about your funeral in advance ensures your personal values are respected and reduces administrative burden for your family. Many people choose to address funeral arranging alongside major life events, such as purchasing a home, making a will, or retiring.
In our experience across our branches—whether meeting clients at our Sevenoaks office or guiding families at our Tunbridge Wells branch—people who record their wishes early gain immense peace of mind. As Simon Welham notes:
“A question we hear regularly at our branches is whether it is ‘too soon’ to talk about funeral preferences. The truth is, documenting your thoughts early isn’t gloomy—it is one of the most thoughtful gifts you can leave your family.”
Whether you live in Tunbridge Wells, Southborough, Rusthall, Langton Green, or surrounding areas, local independent funeral directors can store your preferences securely until they are needed.
You can make almost every practical and personal decision in advance, including whether you prefer burial or cremation, the style of ceremony, choice of coffin, music, readings, and memorial preferences. However, if you opt for a pre-paid funeral plan, certain elements such as third party disbursements may not be included in the total cost.
Modern funeral choices offer complete flexibility. As noted by the National Association of Funeral Directors, tailor-made ceremonies allow individuals to combine traditional elements with personal, contemporary touches.
| Decision Category | Choices Available | Benefits of Deciding in Advance |
|---|---|---|
| Type of Committal | Cremation or traditional burial | Secures preferred local churchyard or cemetery plot |
| Ceremony Style | Religious service led by vicars, priests, or civil service by funeral celebrants | Ensures the tone aligns with your personal beliefs |
| Coffin & Caskets | Solid wood, veneer, eco-friendly wicker, bamboo, or cardboard | Selects a design that fits your style and budget |
| Personal Touches | Entrance music, hymns, eulogies, dress code, floral displays | Removes guesswork for grieving family members |
| Remembrance Items | Urns, headstone and items of remembrance, memory pins, or keepsake jewellery | Establishes a lasting tribute for future generations |
When arranging custom funeral packages, you can specify every finer detail:
Our funeral arrangers at our Funeral director Borough Green and Swanley branches frequently work with local families to record these decisions step by step, ensuring no detail is overlooked.
You should inform your close family, a trusted friend or executor, and your chosen funeral director about your funeral plans, making sure they know where your written preferences are stored.
Simply writing down your wishes is not enough if nobody knows where to find them. A ‘letter of wishes’, a separate document from your will, should be kept alongside your will, but stored where your executor can easily access it prior to probate. You can find guidance on how to write a letter of wishes here.
“In our over thirty years of experience as funeral directors, we have had many clients who wish to plan their own funerals and a common concern that individuals and families share is that if written wishes get locked inside bank vaults, they may not be accessible before the funeral,” says Rebecca Welham. “We always advise clients to lodge a copy directly with our experienced funeral arrangers. That way, when the time comes, we can immediately guide the family according to your exact instructions.”
You can read more about how our family team supports local clients by visiting our team page.
You can ensure your loved ones can pay for your funeral by putting in place a pre-paid funeral plan, setting aside funds in a dedicated savings account, or using over-50s life insurance.
Data from the SunLife Cost of Dying Report (2026) shows that funeral costs continue to rise year-on-year. Taking out a pre-paid plan allows you to fix the funeral director’s costs at current rates, shielding your family from future inflation.
| Funding Method | Cost Protection | Guarantees Funeral Wishes? | Impact on Family at Bereavement |
|---|---|---|---|
| Pre-paid Funeral Plans | High – Fixes funeral director fees at today's prices | Yes – Directs every element of the service | Minimal – Costs and arrangements are pre-arranged |
| Savings Account | Low – Subject to inflation and rising costs | No – Wishes must be documented separately | Moderate – Family must access funds via estate/probate |
| Over-50s Insurance | Medium – Pays out a fixed sum | No – Payout may not cover full future costs | Variable – Depends on total payout vs final invoice |
Since July 2022, all funeral plan providers operating in the UK must be authorised and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority (FCA), ensuring client funds for pre-paid plans are held securely in independent trusts or regulated insurance policies and that families are financially protected.
Our family-run team offers tailored advice on pre-paid funeral plans, allowing you to pay upfront or spread payments over manageable instalments.
Planning your own funeral in advance empowers you to make thoughtful decisions, protect your family from financial strain, and ensure your life is celebrated exactly as you choose.
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